Dr. Vicki Haspels
  • Home
  • 1:1 Services
    • Readings
    • Inner Growth Coaching
    • Reiki Plus
    • Past Life Regression
  • Learn Tarot
    • Tarot Practitioner Course
    • Tarot Reading School
  • Meditation Training
    • Effortless Meditation
    • Effortless Meditation Training
  • Blog
  • More...
    • Home
    • 1:1 Services >
      • Readings
      • Inner Growth Coaching
      • Reiki Plus
      • Past Life Regression
    • Learn Tarot >
      • Tarot Practitioner Course
      • Tarot Reading School
    • Meditation Training >
      • Effortless Meditation
      • Effortless Meditation Training
    • Blog
  • Inner Circle Member Log In
  • Home
  • Blog
1:1 Services
  • Readings
  • Inner Growth Coaching
  • Reiki Plus
  • Past Life Regression
Learn Tarot
  • Tarot Practitioner Course
  • Tarot Reading School
Meditation Training
  • Effortless Meditation
  • Effortless Meditation Training
Inner Circle Member Log In

Published on
August 4, 2021

Some Mantras For Self Healing

blog
Picture
Picture
Published on
July 23, 2021

Finding Your Purpose

blog

I gave a walk through of my recent breakthrough in another blog
CLICK HERE TO READ
​where there had been consistent clear messaging.

This time the message did not come directly for me, it came as a message for others and I found it relevant to my current Spiritual shift and critical to my surrender to this shift. 

Here is a summary of what I understood because it is something I found fascinating and relatable.

I am also including some self healing tips at the end of this article.


Cobalt Blue is where we start.
This colour represents the 5th layer of the aura. The 5th layer is called The Etheric Template Body. The Etheric Template Body, when visualised, looks like a photo negative. It is a complete reversal of The Etheric Body, 1st layer of the aura, and is described as negative space. In other words it is the energy around the Etheric Template Body that creates its shape. Here we hold the library of our potential.
For example, if you were born without a limb that limb would still be represented in The Etheric Template Body. This in no way means you should have been born with that limb, nor can it be regenerated. It is simply a blueprint of the potential of The Etheric Body. 
It is here you can access your Soul Purpose as destiny, your soul contracts are stored here to be experienced at the appropriate time and it is also a two way door as it collects the human experience once it has been completed.


                                                   **JUST LIKE A PHOTO NEGATIVE**
Picture


IT CAN BE A COMPLEX AREA SO LET'S BREAK IT DOWN...

The Etheric Template Body as it is is cobalt blue in colour. It shows as negative space and can be tuned into any time. It is accessed during healing or meditation and can be tuned into anytime by sitting quietly and going within.


Because it is essentially a library of our soul purpose this lifetime it is also the place we connect to when we are ready for change or change is upon us. We connect to this aura to download our next experience. Some call this manifestation, I call it BECOMING. We become our own potential.
I also believe that we have a pre-destined timeline which is also accessible in this aura. 



The information is not drawn down immediately, it is not that simple. We are having our human experience to clear old karma and bring in new karma. The intent is remembered, or recognised, as the next step of the journey. The information stored in the blueprint, which if you remember is our full potential, is initially downloaded to the Astral Body (we will learn about the Astral in another article). It is then distributed to The Mental Body to articulate it or give it a name, The Emotional Body to expose emotions attached to this new experience and finally the Etheric Body to create the plan. We then drop this experience into the physical body to create real life experiences.


This course of action will play itself out until the original blueprint (design of the etheric template body) is realised in the human experience. The human experience, as we all know, is often difficult, and the physical experience provides the discomfort required to launch us into our destiny. Expect to feel mental disruption, limited imagination, feeling disconnected, lack of purpose and inhibitions. This can include apathy, anxiety, anger, frustration and confusion. These feelings, or distortions, help create the catalyst required for lasting change.
It is this ultimate connection with our higher purpose experienced through deep feelings of “knowing” that drive us towards completion and refuse to let life knock us down.
This knowing, or higher purpose, is the Soul Purpose. It is not just one thing but a series of experiences that contribute to our Soul or Karmic contract we agreed to before birth. 



The Etheric Template Body is connected to our Throat Chakra, the chakra of Will, which in turn dictates how we respond to the opportunity presented. If we feel fear we resist and our way becomes difficult. When we have faith we surrender and the way is smoother.  How we choose to travel to this destination is our choice, or our will.
No matter whether you exhibit fear and resistance or surrender and flow you will always arrive at the perfect, pre-destined time.
The throat chakra is power, our power, and we have the power to choose our reactions. By tuning into all the Auric Bodies you can be involved every step of the way. You may have experiences that are out of your control but your journey is defined by how you choose to react to those challenges. 



When working effectively with The Etheric Template Body you grow confidence in your ability to move forward. You have the opportunity to  express your true nature and create your own unique path. It’s not that you know everything, you are simply connected to a deeper feeling, the language of the soul. This allows you to feel safe enough to surrender to Divine Will. 

P.S. Conversely, the physical experience, once completed is then uploaded and stored in The Etheric Template Body (or library) for future, or future lives, reference.




Healing Tips


  • For physical/emotional/mental healing I recommend attending a trusted healing practitioner. For self healing you can focus your intent on connecting and downloading the Etheric Template Body’s optimum plan for your physical self. 
  • For Soul Purpose you can use attunement meditation to connect to the higher plane and have a conversation with your soul. You can listen to my Thursday night channelled meditations here or you can join me on a Thursday for the real time experience.
  • For an all round healing, clearing or stronger connection you can also use sound. As this body is connected to the throat chakra sound healing is ideal. The throat chakra resonates to the note of G. Here is a link to Tibetan Bowl sound healing on YouTube​
Sources: Hands Of Light Healing by Barbara Brennan and The Essence of Sound by Evelyn Mulders


Psychic Readings
Crystal Reiki
Tarot Reading School
Tarot Practitioner Course
Introduction To The Modern Oracle
Past Life Regression Therapy
Soul Coaching
Published on
July 23, 2021

Something Has Got To Give...

blog
In order to surrender to the new information coming through one must first become vulnerable. That means feeling anxious, disconnected and sometimes physically unwell.

​I had a blast of all three this past month, this means a major shift. How do I know this? Over the years I have made it my mission to deeply connect to my Self through self awareness practices and connection to Spirit. I might sometimes go on a bit about it (I think I do, lol) but it is these strategies that work. This always forms the basis of my spiritual practice, the knowledge I share and the work I do.



Number One, the most important of my and any spiritual practice is meditation.
I have been asking the question for a couple of months now, how to connect to this shift I have felt coming. The answer has always been the same, and while I acknowledged it in the moment, it has taken a little time to integrate.  The answer was to return to the old ways, the ways that brought me to this point. The regular meditation, the connection to my tribe, to step forward will change everything. Every meditation was gentle, non-judgemental of my life and never wavered from the message. Meditation did not soothe my day to day life, it gave my struggle context, allowed me time to surrender and confidence I was on my right path.



Number Two, the signs.
First were the subtle nudges such as numbers and synchronicities, then emotional surges with no context, then the direct messages from my guidance. Signs bump me out of my current thinking, distract me and make me stand still for a moment. I check in with my feelings, that all is ok. I do not try to analyse my signs. I always see them as a checkpoint. To analyse is to be distracted. I am satisfied I have been contacted and I am open for the direct messaging.



Number Three, managing the emotional, mental, physical fallout.
This is always a personal aspect. I have a chronic condition that has left me physically disabled and continues to direct all of my life and life decisions. I would not be here without it so I take it all into account. As I mentioned earlier, I do tend to overanalyse but my physical and emotional selves will remind me to stay on track. These aspects of my Self connect me to my tribe. Where would any of us be without our people. When I hit this aspect I realise how isolated I have become and I reach out to my peeps. Do you have your peeps yet? The no judgement, tell you the truth, love you to pieces people? Gather them, they are gold. 



At the end, and I feel like I have finally fully surrendered, I am integrating the messages and strategies my higher self gave me during meditation, I am following my intuitive path because my guidance is so clear. My guidance is so clear because I gave myself the time and space needed to  listen to my heart. I refuse to be angry with myself, I support all my decisions, I know where I am going now. 

P.S. I don’t know exactly where I am going, I know how I feel about where I am going and that feels amazing. I will always chase the amazing feeling because it connects me to my purpose. 


You can listen to my past recorded Thursday night channelled meditations

CLICK HERE FOR PAST CHANNELLED MEDITATIONS


or you can join me on a Thursday for the real time experience.

BOOK INTUITION MEDITATION CIRCLE HERE



Psychic Readings
Crystal Reiki
Tarot Reading School
Tarot Practitioner Course
Introduction To The Modern Oracle
Past Life Regression Therapy
Soul Coaching

​
Published on
June 6, 2021

Self Support Or Self Sabotage...

blog
Picture
I talk many times about Self Awareness and how critical it is for a robust Spiritual Life. I believe Self Awareness is the most important aspect of the human condition. It teaches us surrender, compassion, gratitude and provides the full cup required to be able to reach out and support others by filling their cup. 
I have always striven to keep myself in check and healthy. Self Awareness is not something that can be taught as such, it is something that I endeavoured to maintain in my earlier years of trauma and illness. Back in those days I was not even aware that it was called anything. To me it meant the difference between living and existing.


The other day I found a quote that took me beyond my understanding of Self Awareness and it gave me a feeling of completion. The quote is as follows:


“Awareness isn’t the most powerful thing about your spiritual practice. It’s the moment after that you sink or swim. After noticing do you praise yourself or get mad? Guess which brings about real change?” Author: @Mystical.Digita1


This shook me a little. I always assumed Self Awareness was the final answer and from that you made your conscious decisions. I have many personal challenges and emotional blocks that I am fully aware of. I make my decisions, even unhealthy ones, from this point of awareness, understanding that I will, eventually work out the old patterns, feel in control and move on. This pattern has been my mainstay. It took this quote to help me realise that there is one extra simple step before surrender and healing...the action and reaction after awareness of Self. 


The message in the reaction is both simple and profound. How does one discharge the pattern immediately? 


Praise = self support, Get Mad = self sabotage 


It is here, in this moment, that change will occur. This is the conscious moment, the decision to support myself or self sabotage. It is this small awareness that cuts through the days, months and years of healing required to arrive at the same moment. 


Fear will always bog you down with reasons and excuses as to why this happened, past trauma, past treatment, abuse, neglect. Thinking, overthinking, pulling apart, naval gazing will keep you in this spiral.... Stay present....choose....keep it simple....
So, what will you choose when it comes to your turn....Support 👍 or Self Sabotage 👎


With love, Vicki xx


Readings
Tarot Reading School
Tarot Practitioner Course
Meditation
Intuition Training
Reiki Master
The Modern Oracle
Past Life Regression Therapy
​
Published on
May 17, 2021

Thought As Energy

blog
I want to tell you a story about how our thoughts are energy and how I found this out with funny but far reaching consequences.


One day I was attending a group healing open day in the 90’s. This was once a month in a big hall with lots of healing tables set up. Many qualified healers were there and you rocked up, put your name down and received a healing.


I had attended a couple of these days and knew some in the healing community. This was early in my learning days. I immersed myself in as many of these types of activities as I could. Healing was my favourite because I could bliss out for 30 minutes and get an amazing energy boost.


On this particular day I was receiving a healing by one of the best healers there, really looking forward to my bliss out, lay down and boom!! I had a talker beside me. 


I was a little annoyed to begin and thought they would be like me and eventually zone out and become still. No way, the healer and the recipient just kept chatting about really mundane things. 


I decided to ignore it, tried to find my zen and became increasingly frustrated to the point of anger. I was yelling at this person, in my head, to “just shut up.” I would never be so rude, nor bold enough, to say something like that out loud. And my anger grew, then this happened…


The healer exclaimed “Oh! You’ve got a blue ring around your neck!! It just turned up! I wonder where that came from?”


It came from me… My frustration, my anger, my thoughts created a blue ring around her neck to make her quiet. I was embarrassed and a little bit amazed that that could happen. That was one of my first confirmations that our thoughts create energy and I received instant results on that message. 


On reflection the following things have occurred to me. 
I did not consciously create the ring. The spirit world worked with me to create the best way to make that lady quiet.
The blue ring was not created maliciously. I did not wish her any specific harm, I just wanted some quiet time.
The blue ring was a demonstration of how energy is created from thoughts. We all have thoughts.
There was no shame in what happened, it happened in a healing and safe environment, it was meant to be.


Here is my message to you. Be mindful that your thoughts are energy and where you direct your thoughts so will the energy flow. Thoughts happen so quickly and randomly that we cannot be conscious of all the things we think, we cannot control everything. Be mindful of how you are feeling. Chances are your thoughts are creating discord in your body. Listen to the body, not the thoughts. Once you become aware your thoughts are creating the discord you have the opportunity to make the choices you want for your best life. Spirit/guides are our helpers and will boost any energy you are generating, including thoughts. They are not your boss/parent, they are your guidance. You are always in control.


With love


Vicki xx
Published on
May 9, 2021

The Two Types Of Boundaries

blog
I sat down to write about boundaries for my students and something wonderful happened. Every time I wrote a bit down I was pushed and extended past what I thought boundaries meant. I have written about boundaries before in previous blogs and I want to share something I had never considered previously....


We all talk about strengthening our boundaries but how do you tell when your boundaries are being compromised. What happens?


I really had to think about what that means to me as a practitioner, as a teacher and personally. 


Firstly we need to identify what boundaries are and where they are stored in our psyche or soul. Boundaries are a part of living as a human. We choose our boundaries and we enforce those boundaries. We have been taught the boundaries we live by and we have created boundaries through lived experience. Lets keep it simple. We have two types of boundaries, lets look at what they are and how we experience them…


#1 Learned boundaries
Learned boundaries begin in childhood and through our lived experiences we shift and change them as we become more at ease with our world and our part in it. For example, you may have not enjoyed broccoli as a child however as your tastes changed and you became a little more adventurous in your palette you introduced it to your diet, learned how to prepare it and voila you realise that broccoli is not so bad after all. This boundary represents your values. You will feel the boundary challenge in the body. It is visceral. This is your excitement and anxiety (solar plexus), intuition (sacral chakra), soul (heart chakra) all reaching out to say things are changing. Your body is the barometer so listening to it will keep you healthy, creative and feeling in control. This is always Self Growth.


My prescription: meditation to learn to listen to your body/soul. Exercise to become aware of the subtle nuances of the body. 


#2 Self Imposed boundaries
This boundary is one of fear and in some instances trauma. This boundary is decided on by our belief system and can be somewhat more difficult to shift. An example would be where you have a phobia, superstition and outdated religious beliefs. No amount of logic, cajoling or forcing ourselves will shift your deep seated conviction that something bad will happen if you defy this self imposed boundary. This boundary is felt in the mind and can present itself as chronic anxiety (brow chakra), depression (sacral or base chakra) and rage (throat or base chakra). The self imposed boundary is the antithesis of change and expansion. When this boundary is being challenged it is difficult to identify. It presents itself as a lie and therefore sends us off on a distracting quest to frustration when nothing makes sense or is resolved. With mindful precision you can catch this challenge and master the fear. I promise it is doable and requires real dedication to your mental wellbeing. 


My prescription: Past Life Regression, Regular Counselling, Reiki, regular group meditation, mindfulness training. The best way to gain control of this boundary shift is to ignore the story/lie the mind wants to impose and stay with the emotion/feeling until it too disappears. No adding to the trauma by making up excuses, just be present. 


These boundaries will only become apparent to you when you are more than ready to move them on or strengthen (for your highest good only here) them. The stronger they affect you the stronger the change and the greater the benefit to you as a person. My personal mission has always been: if I can be my best self then that will ripple out into the universe and give strength and love to all. I can only be my best when my cup is full. Only then can I give to others. Strong, healthy boundaries give me the space to be my best self. I have lived with physical pain and personal trauma all my life and living my life as a spiritual being has been the best decision I have ever made. My spirituality gives me something to live for and I will back myself at every turn. It works, and it works well. 


If you are ever feeling low or not understanding when you are feeling blocked or stuck, contact me for some Soul Coaching and we will work together to make a difference in your life.


With love, 
Vicki xx


Psychic Readings
Tarot Reading School
Tarot Practitioner Course
Reiki Master

Past Life Regression Therapy
Soul Coaching

​
Published on
May 2, 2021

Challenging The Mind

blog
Picture
Picture
This week on the road I was confronted with a dilemma, do I or don’t I...

I am not sure if I have ever shared it here but I have a disability which I have lived with since I was 19. Every once in a while I am faced with a decision about what physical discomfort I am prepared to endure in order to have a positive life affirming experience. Sometimes I must decline because the risks are too great, sometimes it is not as difficult as I expected and sometimes I give it a go and see how far I can take it. I was presented with a challenging bush walk and decided to see how I would fare. It was a little scary and there was potential for real damage but I used my intuition and made those conscious decisions step by step. As I was going along my walk I marvelled at how much I was able to achieve and reflected on the strategies I was employing. These are long term strategies I have had to use all my adult life and I use them every day in my spiritual work as well. I was so, so proud of myself, that I gave it a go and did not let my fear take over. You don’t have to have a disability to find yourself at a dead end and maybe you will recognise some parts of yourself here. So what was it that made the day so amazing....


Accepting help: Not just asking for help...accepting help. I realised that one of the hardest hurdles I had faced is not about asking for help, it was actually realising I needed help. Once I used to be so wrapped up in my idea of independence that it was not on my radar that I could even ask for help. I truly believed I had to do it all myself. It took a friend to really sit me down and explain the suffering she witnessed and how help would improve my quality of life. I was gobsmacked, I had no idea I was living so poorly. It did take some convincing and trust that I would not be ridiculed for not being “able.” It changed my life and it improved the respect I had for myself, once I understood that to believe I deserved help before it worked for me. On my walk I had help and, I asked for help whenever I needed it and, I accepted help when it was offered, with no feelings of embarrassment. That was simply because I believed I deserved this amazing experience and I was going to accept all that was on offer to achieve it. I wasn’t going to miss out!

Anxiety is my friend: I was anxious most of the time because some of the walk stretched my physical limitations and I did not want to fall over or slip. My anxiety was my watch dog and my moderator. It kept me focused on every step. I truly practiced mindfulness because every step counted. As a result I was fully immersed in the amazing contour and texture of the gorge I was travelling. I did not have much thinking time for any problems or worries. I was fully present. Thank you anxiety :)
Be creative: all my adult life I have been in training for this walk. There were some parts where I was very physically challenged and the person who was supporting me made suggestions that were very logical and sensible. I showed him my solutions which were funny to watch but worked for me. Sometimes I had to slide along on my backside, sometimes I had to take a long way around. My years of living with limitations has always paid off with my expanded creative mind. I’ve had to work my personal solutions for every day activities that most people do not have to think twice about. I’m very proud of that.

​Letting go of what others think of me: If you’re a Friends fan then you may remember the episode where Rachel snubs Phoebe because of her running style. I’m Phoebe most of the time. I move in a weird way, I make noises like tennis players sometimes to get me past a pain moment but mostly I am slow and thoughtful. I look clunky and in the past I’ve had loved ones make some disparaging remarks. Sometimes random people would be impatient and nearly knock me over trying to get past me. I laugh about it now but once upon a time it made me different and I didn’t want to be noticed like that. I have had some very embarrassing moments, some very traumatic moments and some very sad, sad moments because of my disability. I use those moments now to keep me going. I remember what has been stripped away, there is not much more to be exposed and I weigh up the option of doing nothing and missing out or having a go and maybe I will feel better about giving it a go, too bad if I look funny. Even I laugh about it now, so many silly moments....
The end result of my travels through the Karijini National Park...I won!! I did it and I didn’t get scared and run away, I problem solved and my reward was to swim in the most amazing natural water pools in a truly spiritual place. 


I consider myself fortunate these days. If I did not have this disability I would not be where I am, doing what I love. I overcame fear of rejection, I learned my value and I live my true self. If I did not have this disability I would truly be lost, I was heading that way when it struck. It has taken me years of training and determination to have the best life and times I knew was waiting for me. I eventually realised that nobody and nothing was going to swing by and fix it. I chose to make it better. I chose life. 


Do you know what happened once I made that choice.... Spirit stepped in and lifted me to even greater heights than I could imagine. That’s how I live and that is why I do what I do. My mission is to help you understand your power. When you access that power and begin to choose your own adventure, life begins. The signs and guides you are looking for make themselves known. They can only help when you are working for your highest good. You show yourself you’re worth it and it is reflected in the help you receive. You show yourself you are not worthy and that is reflected in the help you receive. The way forward is in your hands, what will you choose? 


With love, Vicki xx
Psychic readings
Tarot readings
Reiki
Past Life Regression 
Meditation
Tarot Reading School


Published on
April 25, 2021

Feeling The Energy

blog
Picture

While I have been travelling I have been experiencing a phenomenon I have not felt for a long time, an energy connection to places and areas that wants to pull me out of my body. They were once called Earth vortexes and the energy of spirits trapped in the earth realm. I was once very fearful of these feelings and overcoming that fear is part of my spiritual growth. I remember wandering in fear for many years believing I was going to be visited by spirits and that I would be taken over or hurt in some way. That is what I was being taught at the time. I have no fear now and it is because I have a strong connection to my own guidance, I refuse to let the fear of the energy overwhelm me and I no longer take another persons experience as a definitive explanation. As I walked my own path and created my personal and intimate connection with Spirit I came to understand differently. Now I welcome the energy shifts. When I lean into them they nourish and inspire me. We each experience energy in different ways and our own way of rationalising the feeling is in direct alignment of our acceptance of the energy of Spirit that works with us. 



I wanted to discuss this here after I visited an old settlement and felt the old stirring. I knew the memory of this place was living through the imprinted energy of the previous inhabitants. I am not triggered everywhere I go and I found this to be intriguing. I believe it was a past life experience. I connected to the energy of someone who lived here at this settlement and recognised their memory imprint left here. I believe that at this time in our history I lived in another country. The person I connected with came to Australia from this country. I can connect to this by doing a past life meditation for myself. This is something that can be learned for yourself or you can experience it while having a past life regression. The connection I had was an uplifting one because I felt happy and  my heart is full, even now as I write. To have these connections, while interesting to talk about, is vital to our mind, body, soul wellbeing. I say that because it reminds us that we are not alone and there is a greater power that connects us all. This power is of unconditional love and healing. During a Past Life Regression we visit this power to connect to our Soul and during meditation we connect to this power to grow stronger. This spontaneous connection provided a well needed healing and an energy uplift. Like catching up with an old friend.

Another experience I had was one where I felt out of my body. It was an odd experience and at any time I could have just left and astral travelled. This felt like universal energy, the energy of the surrounds of time and space that the universe is made up of, the particles of all matter. It is not always a pleasant body experience and not one of my favourite things to go into. I am still learning to trust the mind expansion that can happen with this. It is easy to get lost and very alluring to stay there. I have witnessed this phenomenon many times, succumbed a couple of times, but I personally find it nice to visit but not live there. I get lost in time and do not feel very grounded.

The last experience I want to talk about is the connection to the timelessness of the Earth we live on. We camped at the foot of a beautiful mountain and I felt such a connection to the protective nature of this mountain that I inadvertently called it grandfather mountain. I felt the combined stability of The Emperor and The Hermit from the Tarot. I felt so safe and was happy to sink into the warm and comforting vibes I was picking up. I had a great sleep and ready for the day ahead. This energy to me is perfect for feeling grounded, connected to the environment that sustains and provides as well as the ancient and timeless wisdom stored here. I did not need to understand the message, just to be comforted was enough.


Energy is energy. It is all around us and those who are sensitive or psychic will experience this regularly. Everything we experience is a reflection of the power we possess. The strength of the signal is the strength of your own divine power. You can run from it, fear it, try to control it but it will always bring you back to one place...YOU. Spirit energy, past life energy, astral energy etc is with us always. Learning to access it for your own personal and spiritual growth is the only way to feel in control and comfortable with its power, your power. 


If you really feel you are ready to take your self awareness to this next level I suggest joining my meditation group or find one that is focused on Spiritual growth not fear of the unknown.

With Love
Vicki xx



Tarot Reading School
Tarot Reading
Meditation
Crystal Reiki
Soul Coaching
​Past Life Regression Therapy


Published on
April 18, 2021

The Past Is Best Left There

blog
Picture
I receive a lot of my healing and inspirational messages from my meditation practice. This past year I have noticed that old trauma has been affecting my quality of life again and now as I write, on reflection, I have been made aware of the effects for a couple of years now. This is really difficult to reflect on but I want to share some insights I gained recently.


What has changed?
I have become aware of the chain of thought processes, my emotional reactions, my physical reaction and the utter hopelessness of the spiral I continually found myself in. I was in this state until very recently and it is the practice of meditation and the healing space it creates around me that has kept me sane. The effects of my trauma have always been there but knowing this does not in itself heal it. I have been down that road before and I can assure you that you cannot will it away. The extent of emotional, mental and physical pain and discomfort I felt was acute and in direct proportion to the urgency in which it was ready to be released. 



Ugh...not gain!! 
I really thought that after all these years of mind, body and spiritual balancing I had developed the exact healing prescription. I did...sort of. My way of healing my spirit was so advanced that it didn’t occur to me that I would not be ok, that I would not recover for years. It has, my friends, been a slow process and one in perfect timing for a perfect outcome. 



The Process
It has been a slow and painful deep dive into my childhood, one I did not know was necessary. I could recall most things and believed they were in the past as the memories were not directly related to any emotional reactions I had ever experienced. 

When I began my adult spiritual awakening I poured my full heart and soul into my healing process because I felt the power move through me and I knew I had connected to the power of spirit within me. It is only now I understand that I was working back towards the point of origin. 
In my adult life I experienced physical, emotional and mental abuse from people I believed loved me the most, I contracted a debilitating illness that still affects every aspect of my life to this day and my loved ones were used as weapons against me.I truly believe this was the cause of my soul imbalances and I was determined to live my best life. I accessed healers, readers and sat in meditation circles for years. What I understood along the way was that these things in themselves are not the cure, they are the best way to access my Soul Wisdom. I did the work, I surrendered to the energy of spirit and I gained control of myself, my thoughts and my destiny.

Or so I thought...
Once I was working for myself as a professional reader and healer the next phase began to creep in. As I mentioned, I had a handle on how to manage the eruptions that occurred from past and present hurts. I welcomed this new phase. I always emerged stronger and more attuned to spirit. Nope, this was different. Before I knew it I was plunged into one of the darkest places I’ve ever been without any guidance. Usually there was a cause and effect situation but this dip was much more severe because the more I sunk into it the worse life got. By the time I realised I was out of my depth it was too late and there was nothing to do but wait it out. This was worse because I had nothing to link it to, nothing to blame, nothing to understand and no healing, meditating, counselling or readings touched the surface. And so I fell into a long term, debilitating depression for nearly 2 years. I thought I was done....


Vicki! Get to the point!!

I’ve written about the crisis of my faith in previous blogs so I won’t give the full story here about my way back to myself. What I did have to do though was visit my childhood trauma in all it’s ugliness. I had to sit in the very real sadness (and I’m crying writing this) and actually feel the pain of those times. And so I went. 


**Actually, as I’m writing this I am receiving insights to this journey I’m writing about so I am going to pass the information on immediately. I had never understood why I had to endure depression when I was always a willing healing and self awareness participant. I just got the answer. The depression I experienced was so different to anything I’ve ever felt before. I wasn’t sad or crying. I felt nothing. I mean absolutely numb. I never cried once and I could not even experience an ounce of joy. Every emotion from that time was faked, it was the only way to survive. I now understand I would not have been able to visit my childhood trauma effectively if I was experiencing any emotions. Being depressed actually allowed me to do the exploratory work I needed to release the attachments to the survival responses I no longer needed to continue in my work...OMG, I am so happy!!**


Anyway, I was contemplating writing this blog to showcase how my Soul Coaching worked when I realised another amazing thing. The protective measures in place, the things I thought had been programmed by others who had control of me were all mine. I created the mantras of self deprecation, people pleasing and worthlessness as a means to explain the dreadful treatment of me by others. They did not give me the words. I gave them to myself and every time I was re-traumatised I repeated my rationalisations because nothing else made sense. I repeated them until they became my truth, my shield, my protection. What occurred, dear friends, is that with this realisation I took my power back! Yes! I own the words, I can release their hold on me. I HAVE THE POWER. I always did. 

I wonder if this is true for all iterations of the deep programming we unconsciously repeat until the power of our soul releases us from our torment and shows us the way. The path can sometimes be ugly but worth it. Never travel it alone, there is always help. 

My lovely friends, I meandered through the telling of this story and it began when I was recently a passenger in a 4WD doing some off-roading. I was terrified of nothing and nothing I could tell myself would ease the fear. So, I did what I always do, I meditated on it. Not a sit down for hours meditation mind you. I let the feelings wash over me in a quiet moment and let my Soul Wisdom take care of the details. I allowed the fear to come to the surface, l went with it and the intensity eased. It really is that simple and I received relief. I don’t really care about the origins of the trauma, that is just for context. I am more interested in the process of releasing the binds that keep me in a pattern of emotional reaction that affects the quality of my life. And I do it because it works. 


TL:DR
  • Childhood trauma results in ourselves doing the programming that is used to keep us feeling safe when we sometimes don’t. 
  • Sometimes that programming is not healthy and when it is time to let it go the Soul will facilitate circumstances to assist with the release. This is called discomfort.
  • Meditation helps you to find the place the answers reside. 
  • A wise person once said, we all have the answers we are just searching for the right question.
  • Because I understood that I made the programming to suit my circumstances that puts the power back in my hands.
  • And finally, the Soul knows what the Soul knows. Even when it makes no sense, just go with it. It’s the fight to deny that does us in, not the trauma.
  • Find someone you trust to support you through any trauma. Your support does not have the answers, they provide the space you need to find your own way. They are the best people. Only accept the best people.


With love, 
Vicki xx


Psychic readings
Tarot readings
Tarot Reading School
Tarot Practitioner
Crystal Reiki
Past Life Regression
Soul Coaching
Meditation

Published on
April 4, 2021

Mindfulness Walk

blog
This is an outdoor walking/movement activity and takes about 20 minutes. It is best if you can leave your devices at home, make your walk tech free. Make sure you are dressed comfortably, including comfortable walking shoes.

​You are about to embark on a meditative walk to strengthen your connection to
your physical self with the physical world using your 5 senses. Sound, sight, smell, taste and touch. Let’s begin…

Before you take your first step take several slow, even deep breaths. Close your
eyes and become aware of breath inhaling and exhaling. Take your awareness, eyes still closed, to the top of your head. Feel the breeze on your face. Think about how your clothes feel on your body. Finally, take your attention down to your feet. Feel the firm ground under your feet and the weight of your shoes and socks. One more deep, even breath and open your eyes…

To prepare for your sensory walk choose the order of your 5 senses. For example
you may choose smell as your first sense. As you walk along and concentrate your attention only on the smells around you, it may be grass, flowers, cooking smells. Name the smells in your mind. Next you may choose sound. Focus you attention only on sounds. Identify the sounds in your mind…and so on. Repeat this process for the remainder of your senses.

And begin…Take a few moments for each sense before you move on to the next
one. Take your time and enjoy the waking of your senses.
At the end of your walk take note of how difference between how you felt before
this walk to how you feel afterwards. You could, if you like, keep a record of your
experiences.

This is an adaptation of an exercise from the Natureluster Program created by
Stacey Demarco The Modern Witch.

​With Love, Vicki xx
Meditation 
Reiki
Psychic Readings
Tarot Practitioner
Tarot Readings
Tarot Reading School
Past Life Regression
Previous 3 of 6 Next

Author

Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.

Archives

  • April 2026 (1)
  • March 2026 (5)
  • February 2026 (1)
  • August 2025 (2)
  • July 2025 (1)
  • June 2025 (2)
  • May 2025 (1)
  • April 2024 (1)
  • April 2023 (1)
  • October 2022 (1)
  • April 2022 (1)
  • December 2021 (1)
  • August 2021 (3)
  • July 2021 (2)
  • June 2021 (1)
  • May 2021 (3)
  • April 2021 (3)
  • March 2021 (1)
  • February 2021 (3)
  • January 2021 (5)
  • September 2020 (2)
  • August 2020 (1)
  • July 2020 (2)
  • June 2020 (1)
  • May 2020 (4)
  • April 2020 (4)
  • March 2020 (4)
  • February 2020 (2)

Categories

  • blog (52)
  • March 2026 (5)
  • effortless-meditation-library (4)
  • meditation-community-log-in (3)
  • Emotional Processing Technique (1)
  • #1 Welcome (1)
CONTACT ME
ABOUT ME
TERMS AND CONDITIONS
PRIVACY POLICY
​DISCLAIMER
READINGS
HEALINGS
PAST LIFE REGRESSION
COACHING
MEDITATION CLASSES
MEDITATION TRAINING
LEARN THE TAROT
© COPYRIGHT 2026. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.