Vicki Haspels
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The  Conscious Mystic

Feeling The Energy

25/4/2021

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While I have been travelling I have been experiencing a phenomenon I have not felt for a long time, an energy connection to places and areas that wants to pull me out of my body. They were once called Earth vortexes and the energy of spirits trapped in the earth realm. I was once very fearful of these feelings and overcoming that fear is part of my spiritual growth. I remember wandering in fear for many years believing I was going to be visited by spirits and that I would be taken over or hurt in some way. That is what I was being taught at the time. I have no fear now and it is because I have a strong connection to my own guidance, I refuse to let the fear of the energy overwhelm me and I no longer take another persons experience as a definitive explanation. As I walked my own path and created my personal and intimate connection with Spirit I came to understand differently. Now I welcome the energy shifts. When I lean into them they nourish and inspire me. We each experience energy in different ways and our own way of rationalising the feeling is in direct alignment of our acceptance of the energy of Spirit that works with us. 



I wanted to discuss this here after I visited an old settlement and felt the old stirring. I knew the memory of this place was living through the imprinted energy of the previous inhabitants. I am not triggered everywhere I go and I found this to be intriguing. I believe it was a past life experience. I connected to the energy of someone who lived here at this settlement and recognised their memory imprint left here. I believe that at this time in our history I lived in another country. The person I connected with came to Australia from this country. I can connect to this by doing a past life meditation for myself. This is something that can be learned for yourself or you can experience it while having a past life regression. The connection I had was an uplifting one because I felt happy and  my heart is full, even now as I write. To have these connections, while interesting to talk about, is vital to our mind, body, soul wellbeing. I say that because it reminds us that we are not alone and there is a greater power that connects us all. This power is of unconditional love and healing. During a Past Life Regression we visit this power to connect to our Soul and during meditation we connect to this power to grow stronger. This spontaneous connection provided a well needed healing and an energy uplift. Like catching up with an old friend.

Another experience I had was one where I felt out of my body. It was an odd experience and at any time I could have just left and astral travelled. This felt like universal energy, the energy of the surrounds of time and space that the universe is made up of, the particles of all matter. It is not always a pleasant body experience and not one of my favourite things to go into. I am still learning to trust the mind expansion that can happen with this. It is easy to get lost and very alluring to stay there. I have witnessed this phenomenon many times, succumbed a couple of times, but I personally find it nice to visit but not live there. I get lost in time and do not feel very grounded.

The last experience I want to talk about is the connection to the timelessness of the Earth we live on. We camped at the foot of a beautiful mountain and I felt such a connection to the protective nature of this mountain that I inadvertently called it grandfather mountain. I felt the combined stability of The Emperor and The Hermit from the Tarot. I felt so safe and was happy to sink into the warm and comforting vibes I was picking up. I had a great sleep and ready for the day ahead. This energy to me is perfect for feeling grounded, connected to the environment that sustains and provides as well as the ancient and timeless wisdom stored here. I did not need to understand the message, just to be comforted was enough.


Energy is energy. It is all around us and those who are sensitive or psychic will experience this regularly. Everything we experience is a reflection of the power we possess. The strength of the signal is the strength of your own divine power. You can run from it, fear it, try to control it but it will always bring you back to one place...YOU. Spirit energy, past life energy, astral energy etc is with us always. Learning to access it for your own personal and spiritual growth is the only way to feel in control and comfortable with its power, your power. 


If you really feel you are ready to take your self awareness to this next level I suggest joining my meditation group or find one that is focused on Spiritual growth not fear of the unknown.

With Love
Vicki xx



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The Past Is Best Left There

18/4/2021

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I receive a lot of my healing and inspirational messages from my meditation practice. This past year I have noticed that old trauma has been affecting my quality of life again and now as I write, on reflection, I have been made aware of the effects for a couple of years now. This is really difficult to reflect on but I want to share some insights I gained recently.


What has changed?
I have become aware of the chain of thought processes, my emotional reactions, my physical reaction and the utter hopelessness of the spiral I continually found myself in. I was in this state until very recently and it is the practice of meditation and the healing space it creates around me that has kept me sane. The effects of my trauma have always been there but knowing this does not in itself heal it. I have been down that road before and I can assure you that you cannot will it away. The extent of emotional, mental and physical pain and discomfort I felt was acute and in direct proportion to the urgency in which it was ready to be released. 



Ugh...not gain!! 
I really thought that after all these years of mind, body and spiritual balancing I had developed the exact healing prescription. I did...sort of. My way of healing my spirit was so advanced that it didn’t occur to me that I would not be ok, that I would not recover for years. It has, my friends, been a slow process and one in perfect timing for a perfect outcome. 



The Process
It has been a slow and painful deep dive into my childhood, one I did not know was necessary. I could recall most things and believed they were in the past as the memories were not directly related to any emotional reactions I had ever experienced. 

When I began my adult spiritual awakening I poured my full heart and soul into my healing process because I felt the power move through me and I knew I had connected to the power of spirit within me. It is only now I understand that I was working back towards the point of origin. 
In my adult life I experienced physical, emotional and mental abuse from people I believed loved me the most, I contracted a debilitating illness that still affects every aspect of my life to this day and my loved ones were used as weapons against me.I truly believe this was the cause of my soul imbalances and I was determined to live my best life. I accessed healers, readers and sat in meditation circles for years. What I understood along the way was that these things in themselves are not the cure, they are the best way to access my Soul Wisdom. I did the work, I surrendered to the energy of spirit and I gained control of myself, my thoughts and my destiny.

Or so I thought...
Once I was working for myself as a professional reader and healer the next phase began to creep in. As I mentioned, I had a handle on how to manage the eruptions that occurred from past and present hurts. I welcomed this new phase. I always emerged stronger and more attuned to spirit. Nope, this was different. Before I knew it I was plunged into one of the darkest places I’ve ever been without any guidance. Usually there was a cause and effect situation but this dip was much more severe because the more I sunk into it the worse life got. By the time I realised I was out of my depth it was too late and there was nothing to do but wait it out. This was worse because I had nothing to link it to, nothing to blame, nothing to understand and no healing, meditating, counselling or readings touched the surface. And so I fell into a long term, debilitating depression for nearly 2 years. I thought I was done....


Vicki! Get to the point!!

I’ve written about the crisis of my faith in previous blogs so I won’t give the full story here about my way back to myself. What I did have to do though was visit my childhood trauma in all it’s ugliness. I had to sit in the very real sadness (and I’m crying writing this) and actually feel the pain of those times. And so I went. 


**Actually, as I’m writing this I am receiving insights to this journey I’m writing about so I am going to pass the information on immediately. I had never understood why I had to endure depression when I was always a willing healing and self awareness participant. I just got the answer. The depression I experienced was so different to anything I’ve ever felt before. I wasn’t sad or crying. I felt nothing. I mean absolutely numb. I never cried once and I could not even experience an ounce of joy. Every emotion from that time was faked, it was the only way to survive. I now understand I would not have been able to visit my childhood trauma effectively if I was experiencing any emotions. Being depressed actually allowed me to do the exploratory work I needed to release the attachments to the survival responses I no longer needed to continue in my work...OMG, I am so happy!!**


Anyway, I was contemplating writing this blog to showcase how my Soul Coaching worked when I realised another amazing thing. The protective measures in place, the things I thought had been programmed by others who had control of me were all mine. I created the mantras of self deprecation, people pleasing and worthlessness as a means to explain the dreadful treatment of me by others. They did not give me the words. I gave them to myself and every time I was re-traumatised I repeated my rationalisations because nothing else made sense. I repeated them until they became my truth, my shield, my protection. What occurred, dear friends, is that with this realisation I took my power back! Yes! I own the words, I can release their hold on me. I HAVE THE POWER. I always did. 

I wonder if this is true for all iterations of the deep programming we unconsciously repeat until the power of our soul releases us from our torment and shows us the way. The path can sometimes be ugly but worth it. Never travel it alone, there is always help. 

My lovely friends, I meandered through the telling of this story and it began when I was recently a passenger in a 4WD doing some off-roading. I was terrified of nothing and nothing I could tell myself would ease the fear. So, I did what I always do, I meditated on it. Not a sit down for hours meditation mind you. I let the feelings wash over me in a quiet moment and let my Soul Wisdom take care of the details. I allowed the fear to come to the surface, l went with it and the intensity eased. It really is that simple and I received relief. I don’t really care about the origins of the trauma, that is just for context. I am more interested in the process of releasing the binds that keep me in a pattern of emotional reaction that affects the quality of my life. And I do it because it works. 


TL:DR
  • Childhood trauma results in ourselves doing the programming that is used to keep us feeling safe when we sometimes don’t. 
  • Sometimes that programming is not healthy and when it is time to let it go the Soul will facilitate circumstances to assist with the release. This is called discomfort.
  • Meditation helps you to find the place the answers reside. 
  • A wise person once said, we all have the answers we are just searching for the right question.
  • Because I understood that I made the programming to suit my circumstances that puts the power back in my hands.
  • And finally, the Soul knows what the Soul knows. Even when it makes no sense, just go with it. It’s the fight to deny that does us in, not the trauma.
  • Find someone you trust to support you through any trauma. Your support does not have the answers, they provide the space you need to find your own way. They are the best people. Only accept the best people.


With love, 
Vicki xx


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Tarot Reading School
Tarot Practitioner
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Mindfulness Walk

4/4/2021

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This is an outdoor walking/movement activity and takes about 20 minutes. It is best if you can leave your devices at home, make your walk tech free. Make sure you are dressed comfortably, including comfortable walking shoes.

​You are about to embark on a meditative walk to strengthen your connection to
your physical self with the physical world using your 5 senses. Sound, sight, smell, taste and touch. Let’s begin…

Before you take your first step take several slow, even deep breaths. Close your
eyes and become aware of breath inhaling and exhaling. Take your awareness, eyes still closed, to the top of your head. Feel the breeze on your face. Think about how your clothes feel on your body. Finally, take your attention down to your feet. Feel the firm ground under your feet and the weight of your shoes and socks. One more deep, even breath and open your eyes…

To prepare for your sensory walk choose the order of your 5 senses. For example
you may choose smell as your first sense. As you walk along and concentrate your attention only on the smells around you, it may be grass, flowers, cooking smells. Name the smells in your mind. Next you may choose sound. Focus you attention only on sounds. Identify the sounds in your mind…and so on. Repeat this process for the remainder of your senses.

And begin…Take a few moments for each sense before you move on to the next
one. Take your time and enjoy the waking of your senses.
At the end of your walk take note of how difference between how you felt before
this walk to how you feel afterwards. You could, if you like, keep a record of your
experiences.

This is an adaptation of an exercise from the Natureluster Program created by
Stacey Demarco The Modern Witch.

​With Love, Vicki xx
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    Insights I have gathered from my life experiences. Profound messages from my connection with Spirit.
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The information presented for all content offered on this website is for entertainment. It is not intended to take the place of your personal physician’s advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease or mental health condition. Discuss this information with your own physician or healthcare provider to determine what is right for you. All information is intended for your general knowledge only and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment for specific medical conditions.
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